I want to be a better person. I wish I could go back to the person I used to be. That person was funny, clever, cheerful, and an all around great guy. I want to be with the person I used to be with way way back in the day. She is beautiful; she is perfect in every which way. I want to explore new places, but cherish the old ones. I want to be more independent and be my own person without having to base my decisions on what people may think of me. I want to me. Its harder than it sounds, but Im willing to take this path….Truth be told I already started this journey. About a week or two ago something clicked and all of a sudden I see things in a perspective, however its still a little blurry. To start this change I scheduled something that I have always wanted to do, get a tattoo. My tattoo will be the initials of my close friend Joe Malzahn who passed away in May. Im getting this done in a few days; Thursday at 4pm to be exact. This is the start to the “new-old” me. I can only hope that in the coming weeks that happiness and success come my way, because you can bet your sweet ass that those are the two things I will be working my hardest to achieve.

So there is this girl…and shes absolutely amazing, and I hope she is reading this right now.

Work starts in a hot 23 minutes. Its 35*F and the pizza shop is a mile and a half away. Oh yeah I have to walk there, but thats not the worst part of it….I am also pretty sure my co-workers have a lower GPA than the guys from Dumb and Dumber. I am going to be stuck at this hell on Earth until 830pm, and hopefully after that someone will throw down in which I will rage my fucking face off. So yes; there it is..my life tonight in a few sentences. Enjoy your night. Carpe Noctum.

My mind right now is telling me that I should be wary of something close to me, although I can not place my finger on it just yet;  I do however have a slight idea, but then again what i’m thinking could be completely inaccurate. So whomever this post gets to I am sorry for this absolutely pointless post. Forgive me.

Fuck doing the same old same old. Time to get off my ass and some damn chances.

I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me, I will chase them out of my mind and replace them with happy thoughts.

At the beginning of this new year I said “This is going to be one hell of a year.” That statement still holds true today. At the beginning of the semester something that I cared about left my life. During this time (about a week or so) I was hurt and felt betrayed, however I kept my chin up and carried on. It was shortly after this time I stumbled into something truly incredible, although I didn’t think that at the time. I finally recognized that I found something special not to long ago; about an hour ago to be exact. The reason for this becoming is only because of a few words coming out someones mouth. My quote, “This is going be one hell of a year”, still holds true because sometimes people that leave your life is a blessing is disguise; and when someones leaves there is always room for someone that is understanding, relatable, and true to take that persons spot. Just a friendly reminder for whomever may read this…Although the time you are in may be difficult; remain calm, hold your head high, and think positive. Doing this, I promise you, will lead to happier and better times.

It has been a wild first two weeks back at school. New friendships developing, old friendships diminishing, relationships ending and new ones beginning; however with the negative comes the positive…I can not even begin to describe how wonderful this spring semester has been; everyday is bringing great things to me wether it be an amazing person to a nicely rolled J on the table. No matter how big or small, physical or emotional everyday is marvelous. To be honest I’m not quite sure why these great things are happening to me. Could it be coming from a higher power, God perhaps? Maybe it might be my general outlook on everyday. Whatever the reason I am truly thankful for everything.